Chris’ Grandma passed away this morning, after a several week long battle for her life. He got to go say goodbye before they took her off life support. Grandma Karen was instrumental in raising him… he lived with her more often than his parents, especially during his teen years.
Understandably, he’s not himself right now… my heart rips apart every time I watch my happy go lucky man shed a tear. All day, this song has been stuck in my head. It fits him, and her… if I could sing, I would… so I’m just going to go whisper it in his ear.
Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul
I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
…………….
I can’t believe the past two months have gone by so fast. One moment we were sleeping on the floor at my Mother’s house after driving the U-Haul 600 some miles, and the next I am hugging my instructor as cameras flash and my Step-Dad cheers from the audience. Mere days after we moved into our new house I started a C.N.A. class. Waking up in time to be at the facility before 6:30am has been a learning experience.
Between starting work, going off my ADHD medication, settling into a new house with roommates, suffering from the most awful case of bronchitis I ever had, hosting family parties, welcoming my nephew into the world, and dealing with things I don’t even what to explain… it has been an incredibly busy, sad, and rewarding two months. Moving back to Oregon has changed our lives. The fact that I finished this class wasn’t the reason I got misty eyed as I accepted flowers and congratulations, it was knowing we’re happier, healthier, and more successful.
Chris is in Washington at the moment, watching the Grandmother who raised him die, so he wasn’t here to share “this” moment with. Had he been here we would have celebrated with a home cooked meal and something off the DVR. Instead, I drove to the health food store and purchased my first ever KIND Bar, some gf mac & cheese, a tomato, tuna, and juice… and am now vegged out in front the computer trying to decide how to spend my evening.
Editing the nearly 500 pictures I’ve taken in the past two months sounds like a good place to start. Keep an eye on Flickr, it’s going to be a long night.
For the past 24 hours I’ve been sitting here trying to decide what to say. How to introduce my new blog to the world. Due to circumstances I don’t care to explain, All She Is was lost. Completely. 100% of the past 5 years of my writing gone. How do you start over after losing every post you’ve ever made?
I couldn’t face it. So came Fawkesy. The story behind Fawkesy is simple. The phoenix has always enamored me. Years ago I heard Martina McBride’s song From the Ashes and found one of my theme songs. The idea of rebuilding after letting everything go up in a blaze has always felt like a theme in my life. Time and time again I burn out, only to regrow, to become more. Coming back from the loss of my words, rising again – it just fits.
Of course, there is also Fawkes from Harry Potty, one of my favorite characters – hands down. Fawkes.com was taken. So I sat here and thought well gee, how do you put Fawkes in a domain name without making it long and complicated? The Y, making it “foxy” comes from one of my residents at work. A beautiful 99 year old woman who still sings in the shower, “I’m a fox. I’m hot. I’m fooooxy.” I want to be like that at 99. I want to be like that now. So therein lies the Y.
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